The intense medicated fight is about over. I only have one chemo injection left on this Friday.
I have to admit that I'm not too sure how I feel right now. Obviously, I am relieved to be finished with the demands of treatment and look forward to put this whole experience behind me. But as a cancer survivor I desire to understand the meaning of why I was stricken with cancer and how it affects my life going forward. My life has indeed changed. I can never go back to the way it was before.
As a cancer survivor, there will always be a fear of recurrence. That's expected I suppose. In 2011, nearly 71,000 people in the United States were diagnosed with melanoma, and out of that number 12,212 people died. In fact, melanoma is in the top five cancers among white males throughout the U.S.
And while I have encountered many negative side affects due to the treatment, I cannot deny the fact that I've been the recipient of many blessings throughout this experience.
First, my relationship with my wife has grown stronger...I'm so much in love with her. She embodied the true essence of 'helpmate'. For instance, she administered all the chemo injections. Additionally, she arranged all the medical appointments and kept track of my medication intake.
Second, my spiritual life has intensified since receiving the diagnose of cancer. I realize how much life is fragile and precious,and my time here on earth is like a mist on a leaf. Thus, I must be always ready to face Him, for He brings everything out that we do (Ecclesiastes 12-14).
Finally, I must strive to begin living without cancer as a main focus. Although I have changed physically and emotionally, it's time to embrace life again and focus on other important things. Someone once wrote:
"Whether good or bad, life-changing situations often give people the chance to grow, learn, and appreciate what’s important to them. Many people with cancer describe their experience as a journey. It’s not necessarily a journey they would have chosen for themselves. But it sometimes presents the opportunity to look at things in a different way."
As a man blessed with a beautiful, committed wife and the recipient of a renewed faith, I can begin to discern "why I was stricken with cancer."
Now, I must decide how to move forward.